I was bullied ever since middle school. I was homeschooled until 6th grade so I was well educated, but lacked social skills. I was awkward, chubby, and nerdy. The ‘popular’ girls would be so mean and laugh in my face, which made my horrific experience of my first day of school traumatic.
I didn’t have any friends in middle and was really lonely. I decided to go back to being home schooled in 8th grade.
Since private school didn’t work for me, I decided to try going to public school in 9th grade. It was the worst thing that I could have done to myself. The students at Jamestown High School are every person’s worst nightmare. Mean, fake, backstabbing, gossiping, rumor spreading, most malicious group of kids I have ever been around in my life. From my first day, there were rumors that I was a slut and a dirty girl (even though I was Christian and a virgin). The rumors only got worse. Men would try to sleep with me because they thought they had a shot due to the rumors. I started to develop an eating disorder, depression, attempted suicide, serious self-image issues, confidence issues, and started drinking, smoking, and doing drugs. In 10th grade, I decided to drop out and become home schooled again. When I left, the students at my school spread rumors that I was pregnant and had AIDS.
I wanted to study Architecture or Interior Design and college and decided to try to get my 5 year Masters in Architecture from North Dakota State University. To obtain my residency so that I could get in-state tuition, I decided to move to North Dakota and stay with a family member while I went to school in North Dakota. It was a new beginning for me. I was doing extremely well at my new high school, I was elected vice president of my class and cheerleading captain. I had a great, close group of friends and everything was going perfectly, except the fact that I hadn’t stopped doing drugs and drinking.
One day I was caught with drugs and was sent back home to Virginia. I lost my chance to go to NDSU because of one stupid thing. Things got worse, one of my very close friends passed away in a car accident where the driver was under the influence. I had to go back to Jamestown High School where people were meaner than ever.
I was miserable on the inside, I had no one to turn to. This was my rock bottom, when I realized the mess I had become. I decided the only thing I could do was try my best to prove these people wrong. I went back to school, laughed in the face of the people who bullied me and focused on my future. The rumors never stopped but I graduated with straight A’s, got accepted into my first choice university despite my ‘guidance counselor’ telling me that I would be lucky if I graduated from community college.
No one would ever guess that I had this kind of past.
I now have a degree with a minor, a business, the perfect loving boyfriend (3 years!), multiple pageant titles, and successfully modeling and acting, pursuing my dreams.
I am not proud of my past and I never thought of sharing this, but I want people to know that they are not alone. I want to support and inspire those who are being bullied now and make sure no one has to go through what I did.